MrMoustache wrote:
If I"m wrong for doing this, please let me know, but the reason I am on the forum is it's cool to be around other magnum'ophiles, but I've also been using the magnum mania website for research for a rather large (at least by fanfiction standards) magnum story that takes place a year after the show ended. If you'd be interestead in reading it, I'd love any feedback you have, as I haven't really gotten any on fanfiction.net. I tried to write in small vingettes to keep the pace and feel of the show and I tried hard to tie in the series as well as stay true to the chracters. I'm knee deep in chapter 9 as we speak.
Welcome to the boards, MrMoustache! I have read Chapters 1 & 2 so far and you have certainly done what you say, keeping the pace and feel of the show and tie in the series as well as stay true to the characters. I am enjoying it very much and you have done a good job setting the mood for the coming chapters.
You also wrote: I'd love any feedback you have
So here goes:
You might want someone knowledgeable to proofread for you, regarding spelling and punctuation. I would urge you
NOT to use SpellCheck! You might want to refresh your memory on how to write dialogue here:
http://mrbraiman.home.att.net/page13.html (with emphasis on Rule #2)
Most people on this site would probably guess that golfmobile or I would have this kind of feedback for you. We ARE sticklers, but we cut everyone some slack when it comes to posting comments because this is just for fun! All the comments above are meant in the best possible way. So far, this is a very good effort on your part, and keep on writing!
